Chris Rock.

I Always Say About My Daughters, They Save Me from My Miserable Self. They Take Me Out, You Know, a Comedian, You Could Live in Your Head a Lot. and You’re Writing and You’re Doubting. but When I’m with My Kids and My Family, It’s All About Them.

Now That I Have Children, I Realize Taking Care of My Children Is More Fun Than Anything in the Whole World.

I Don’t Write Jokes First. I Write Down Topics. I Think of What I Want to Talk About, and Then I Write the Jokes – They Don’t Write Me… and Even If You Don’t Think It’s Funny, You Won’t Think It’s Boring. You Might Disagree, but You’ll Listen. and Maybe Even Laugh as You Disagree.

You Know, Just Right Place Right Time, Lucked Up. Thank God for Animation. I Can Turn Down a Lot of Movies Now.

I’m a Nerd. I’m a Little Guy… the Last Guy You’d Expect in a Romantic Movie.

Guys Play Characters That Won’t Grow up and Something Catastrophic Happens and They Have to Grow up to Save the Day – That’s Pretty Much What Today’s Comedy Is About,

The Best Part Is Just Having a Partner. There Is No Real Worst Part. I’m Not Going to Say There’s a Worst Part. I Mean I’m a Comedian – Comedians Like to Work Alone. so Maybe I’m Not the Ideal Guy to Be Married To, in That Sense.

I’ve Been Married for 10 Years And, You Know, It’s Hard, You Spruce It up and You Go Places. How Do You Spruce up Anything? Artificially. You Go Places and Do Things.

I Love Having Somebody There – That Companion Thing. You Know Who You’re Going to Eat With, Who You’re Going to See a Movie With.

I’m More Patient. I’m Less of a Recluse. I’ve Been on TV for a Long Freaking Time, and It Can Definitely Isolate You. You Get to Where You Only Have Things in Common with People in the Business, and Kids Open You up to a New World. You Have Something in Common with Just About Everybody. I Think I’m a Better Artist. Everything I’ve Done Since I’ve Had Kids Is Better Than the Stuff I Did Before I Had Kids.

I’m Happy If Everybody Else Is. I’m a Big Brother, the Oldest. If You’re Happy and I’m Not, I’m Cool with That. If I’m Happy and You’re Not, I’m Sad.

I Used to Watch My Father Go to Work Every Day and Come Home and Be so Beat. We Had Seven Kids. I Always Wondered What He Really Wanted to Do. Now That I’m Older and Have My Own Kids, I Realize There’s Nothing Better Than to Work for Your Kids. I’m Sure He Got More Gratification from His Work Than I Do. My Father Was Feeding His Kids Every Week, Paying the Heating Bills. If He Didn’t Work, Then It Didn’t Get Done. There’s a Tremendous Amount of Gratification from That. and a Tremendous Amount of Pressure, Too.

If You Live with a Single Parent, You Don’t See Compromise. You Witness a Grown Person Living in a World Where They Do What They Want to Do. When You Are Raised by Two Parents, You Are Constantly Watching Compromise Take Place. Just by Observing That, It Made Me a Better Person.

All People Naturally Hate. My Kid Bites People Now. I Didn’t Teach My Kid to Bite Anybody. Kids Say Mean Stuff. Only Through Love Do We Get This Evil Out of Them. Only Through Love and Structure and Discipline Do They Not Hate. the Kids That Hate Didn’t Learn Anything, That’s the Problem.

I Love My Life, but I Don’t Think I’m Any Happier Than My Younger Brother Andre, Who Drives a Garbage Truck.

It’s Weird with Stand-up Comedy. It Doesn’t Really Translate Worldwide. I Want to Figure Out How Do I Make It Worldwide. Do a Special in Africa. Can’t Beat That. Pull That Off, Then I Will Have Done Something.

I’m a Rap Comedian the Same Way Bill Cosby Is a Jazz Comedian, Cosby’s Laid Back. I’m Like, Bang, Bang Bang, Right into It.

I Just Remember That Whenever I Got Really Mad or Passionate, Like in an Argument, People Would Laugh, and I’d Be Dead Serious. It Would Happen a Lot. so It Was Like Gee, I’ve Got Something Here..

The Material Comes from Whenever You Realize That You and Someone Else Have Something in Common. so Any Conversation You’ve Had More Than Once, Anything You See Happening to You That You See Happening to a Friend, You Go, Hmmm, That’s a Situation I Can Make Funny..

I Like Talking About Subjects That Aren’t Funny in the First Place and Making Them Funny. so Anything Down and Depressing Is Something I’ll Talk About.

Women Would Rule the World – If Only They’d Stop Bitchin’ About Each Other.

I Don’t Think My Comedy Is That Political. It’s More Social. but Whatever. When You Make Comedy and You Do Stand-up, You Work Alone. Movies Have to Go Under so Much Scrutiny. a Stand-up Special Is a Vision, and a Movie Is a Consensus in a Lot of Ways.

It’s No Different. It’s Not Like I Ever Cursed Around My Mother or Anything. I Never Had a Hard Time Turning It on and Off. It’s Like You Enter Another Country – Sometimes You’re in a Cursing Country and Then You’re in a Kid’s Country.

I Think If I Were to Get as Big as I Could Get, It Does Change Your Mind-state. I Think Like the Little Man. I Think Like the Underdog. I Don’t Want to Change That.

There’s No Interference in Stand-up. It’s All the Things It’s Hard to Get in Film: I Get to Have a Wife, I Get to Have Kids. I Get to Be Sexual. I Get to Grow. I Get to Be a Man.

You Want to Track Hollywood Careers, Look in the Real Estate Section. You See a Guy Buy a House That Costs $6 Million, and You Can Literally Start Counting the Days Until He Starts Doing Crappy Movies.

The Only Reaction That Frightens Me Is People Not Laughing. It’s Extraordinary to Me When You Get a Laugh. That You Can Go in Front of a Bunch of People You Never Met Before, You Can Say Some Stuff and They All Laugh in Unison – That’s Amazing. It’s a Miracle.

I Think What Kind of Person You Are During Success Is Who You Are. It’s Easy to Be Nice in Failure and When You’re Broke – Then You Really Need a Lot of Help from People. but After You Win Some Money, That’s the Person You Really Are, Because Now You Can Be Mean to People. You Can Act Like an Asshole. I’ve Seen People Trip Out Again and Again. a Lot of Times This Behavior, When You’re Up, Will Determine If You Get Another Shot Someday, Because Things in This Business Always Go Down. I Want Them to Say, He Was a Nice Guy During the Whole Process. He Never Did the Entourage Thing. Because That Ain’t Funny. It’s Annoying.

For Me, Anything Goes When I Pick up a Mike. I’m Not Trying to Hurt People – I Try Not to Get Too Personal – but I Look at Myself as a Reporter. If You Can Report on Anything That Has to Do with Pop Culture, Then Why Can’t I Make Jokes About It? Yes, It Hurts. but I Figure That Laughter Sometimes Starts from Pain. You Might Wince, but Then I Know That I’m Doing My Job. the Only Thing I Can Do Wrong Is Not Be Funny.